How to no longer feel self conscious by REALLY doing something ...... anything!

In my many years as an acting coach and facilitator the most important lesson I have ever (and will ever) teach is the ability to really listen.

The second most important lesson is how to really do.  And when you really do you will discover the freedom from self consciousness. You will discover that when you truly put all your attention onto something outside of yourself you will no longer feel self conscious. You will discover that once you start really doing you will become more available to your creative impulses, others, the fullness of the moment and you will no longer be existing just in your head.

I can hear you laugh. 'Really do! Why would I need to learn how to really do? All I do is DO!'

Yes that may be so - yet I will still question 'are you really doing whatever it is you do, 100% in this moment?'

It does not matter what your creative pursuit is. It really does not matter what it is you do. These next four steps will transform how you do

1. Ensure the activity you intend to do is physically involving and you know what it is you are going to do - be specific (Thinking is part of the planning not the doing)
2. Know when you have achieved what you have set out to do - an end point
3. Give yourself a reason why you are doing - give meaning to your actions
4. Set a time limit - immediacy is vital otherwise you could waste your time avoiding what it is you need/want to do

Don't just trust me - do this and experience the difference for yourself!

And you must listen to this for more inspiration on how to do! Don't forget to leave a comment to let me know how you go. 

Don't think, do! - John Kennedy

An InLinkz Link-up

Top ten acting tips for everyday life

In an acting class or coaching session with me you will hear the following ten instructions repeated over and over again

Really listen 

Really answer 

Whatever you do do it one hundred percent 

There is no character - it's just you 

Trust you are enough 

*Say what you mean mean what you say 

Live truthfully and fully with your given circumstances 

Work (and live) in this moment - moment by moment 

There is no such thing as nothing - even nothing is something 

Be simple and specific

All of these quotes are words of the great acting teacher Sanford Meisner. (Except this one *which is more mine).

While these quotes are the foundation of an acting technique, over and over I have encountered these themes through out my studies of psychotherapy and philosophy.  So often my students reveal how their acting class has a positive effect on their everyday life and more specifically on their relationships.

If you have the time and resources to take an acting class, why not? Or you can simply focus on just one of these 'tips' and apply it to your life.

I'd love to hear about your discoveries.

Stop acting as if life is a rehearsal. Live this day as if it were your last. The past is over and gone. The future is not guaranteed - Wayne Dyer

will.i.am. I.am.a.fan!

So did you watch 'The Voice' showdowns on Monday night?

I recorded the show and have just viewed it. 

What I really like about this type of program is the coaching element. As a director, teacher and coach I love any opportunity to get a peek into other people's process (especially those who are internationally and commercially successful). While I think this year 'The Voice' is too over produced and is starting to feel like a reality TV show this showdown episode gave some great insight into how to (and how not to!) coach a performer. 

I was so excited by the coaching style of will.i.am. and I think one of his contestants delivered the best performance of the night. I really am getting why this guy is referred to as a genius.

will's instructions to his team were simple, specific and so doable. Totally doable. 

Do this here (singsong it, falsetto). 

Do it like this (stab it like 'benny and the jets'). 

Have fun (I can't sing good like you but I have way more fun than you). 

I was also inspired by his creative interpretation of the songs. I think he really demonstrated the concept of making something your own. 

As I write this I can hear the alternative argument in my head. 

'I don't like it when the director doesn't give me the space to discover it for myself.' 

'I don't like being told move here, say it like this, look this way.'

You know what? Just doing something one hundred percent will open you up to discoveries you will never have imagined.

It does not matter what your creative pursuit is or what role you are in (director/actor, coach/client, expert/fan girl) - simple and specific and doable instructions (directions and guidelines) give the foundation from which creatives can improvise and create...... anything!

Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated - Confucius

NO EXIT: a workshop

I will be running a new acting workshop at the end of June.

It will be based on the play No Exit by Jean-Paul Sartre.

I am very excited by the concept of this workshop. It has been brewing away with me for a number of years and now is the right time to deliver it.

I really hope you can join me. Even if we haven't worked together before this will be a great place for us to meet.

If you would like more information please email me - simoneyoungblog@gmail.com

Hell is other people - Jean-Paul Sartre

Acting is doing ......... get out of your head!

Anyone watching The Voice?   Yes, you follower of the masses.  No, not your thing?  Either way I must mention some feedback will.i.am gave an unsuccessful contestant on Sunday night.

He said something like this "so you made a mistake.  Then you went into your head and stayed there for the rest of the song. You needed to let it go....."

If we have ever worked together you would have heard me say time and time again 'you are in your head'. And. GET. OUT. OF. YOUR. HEAD.

What am I saying?  Stop thinking!!!!

When you think or get stuck in your head you are no longer available to the moment. You cannot do what you need to do 100 percent.

Acting is doing. Not thinking.

So you don't know how to get out of your head? Start listening.  Really listening.

Don't think. Thinking is the enemy of creativity. It's self-conscious, and anything self-conscious is lousy. You can't try to do things. You simply must do things - Ray Bradbury

Acting is doing........did you hear me?!

The foundation of acting is the reality of doing is one of Sanford Meisner's most famous quotes about acting. Simply put, acting is really doing.  And I believe the fundamental skill an actor (and everyone for that matter) needs is the ability to REALLY LISTEN. It is the key to authentic and moving performance. It is crucial to intimate connection. It is essential to being present.


(side note: in my journey as an actor-in-training I worked with lots of people - drama student at the National Theatre Drama School; American acting processes with Jo Canning, Joan Scheckel, Lucy Freeman and Vikki Blanche; film and TV skills with VCA and Swinbourne; comedy with Liz Sadler and Impro Melbourne; voice with Stephen Costan; filmmaking with Dov Simmons ...... and the list goes on and on! I think I was lucky to find an acting process - the Meisner Technique - that met my inner instincts. It is an incredibly practical process that gave me an amazing set of tools. So yes - you will hear me refer to my personal experience often. However my intention is not to diminish any other approaches to performing and creating.  Nor is the intention of this blog to be an homage to Sanford Meisner. I believe it does not really matter what you have or haven't been trained in.  What matters is your ability to get on and do your job).


When you really listen acting is simple. When you really listen you use your whole body - not just your ears. Meisner says "listen with your gut not you head."  When you really listen the words - your lines - will do you.  When you really listen the words you hear will do you.  When you really listen you can do what the director asks of you - not what you think they said. When you really listen you become open and available to the moment.  And that's when magic can happen.

What others say about listening:

Listening is not merely hearing. Listening is reacting. Listening is being affected by what you hear. Listening is active - Michael Shurtleff 

Listening, not imitation, may be the sincerest form of flattery - Joyce Brothers 

The most basic of all human needs is the need to understand and be understood. The best way to understand people is to listen to them. - Ralph Nichols 

An actor’s a guy who if you ain’t talkin’ about him, ain’t listening - Marlon Brando 

You cannot truly listen to anyone and do anything else at the same time - M. Scott Peck 

Man's inability to communicate is a result of his failure to listen effectively - Carl Rogers 

Everything in writing begins with language. Language begins with listening - Jeanette Winterson 

Listening moves us closer, it helps us become more whole, more healthy, more holy. Not listening creates fragmentation, and fragmentation is the root of all suffering - Margaret J  Wheatley

What has meaning to you? Anzac Day?

One element of the Meisner Technique that is tricky to teach is called emotional preparation (which I am not going to explain here). When introducing this acting tool I ask actors to think about and write up a list of the things that have meaning to them.

I say 'go to an area of meaning for you.....'

And invariably I stop there as the expressions on most of the faces before me clearly have no idea what I am talking about.

And so I'll say 'think about what has meaning for you......'

And still confusion.  Yes I realise I am using a bit of jargon. I am also dealing with the evidence that many of us are blindly navigating our way in the world without fully experiencing each moment. It's only when the big things happen that we discover what matters to us most.

This is the thing - what matters to you PLUS your imagination is an integral part of the acting process. This will be your fuel as an actor  (and the fuel to any creative). You need to feel your choices in your gut. Working from your head and in a purely intellectual way doesn't cut it in my opinion.

So what has Anzac Day got to do with this?

Today is a day of national and historical significance. For some they have a deep understanding and personal association with this day. For many it is a great day for the game of AFL and for others it's simply a public holiday and a long weekend opportunity to look forward to. So I ask you 'what does it mean to you?' Do you have an intellectual, socialised or politically correct understanding of this day?  Or do you feel emotionally moved by this day?

When you think about Anzac Day what do you feel?  Does your body react in someway? If it doesn't then I suggest you have an intellectual understanding and that's it. I am suggesting that it doesn't have a 'real' meaning to you - not one that will move you into creativity. And why is this important?  It is the key to authentic performance. Everyday, every moment offers you the opportunity to discover what has real emotional meaning to you versus the socially acceptable response that's from your head.

Please know that I am not having this discussion to diminish the importance of Anzac Day in anyway. I am using it to illustrate the difference between an intellectual understanding and a gut meaning.

So what about me?  I could list a number of head responses but nothing really moves me about this day until I see this

And something in me is moved. Both happiness and sadness is awoken. Aren't these women simply amazing?!  There they are sitting outside a supermarket in the freezing cold giving service.  I can never walk past ladies like these without buying something. Yet I do not stop and chat - even though a part of me wants desperately to connect with these women - because I am afraid of the depths of what I might feel. Just look at those faces. Etched with their life story. And gloriously old. Yes they are old and still living among us! 

And more of my truth is revealed. I look at them and wonder.....

what would it be like if my grandmother was still alive today? How can I still miss her so much?  

And I arrive at my emotional truth - the real meaning I feel for Anzac Day. This and my imagination fuel me and I feel incredibly moved. 

Breathe. 

So I ask you to please share your emotional meaning of Anzac Day. And consider that what you THINK has meaning for you may have no meaning at all.

They shall grow not old, as we that are left grow old;

Age shall not weary them, not the years condemn;

At the going down of the sun and in the morning

We will remember them.                                               For the Fallen - Laurence Binyon